The Good, The Bad, and the loss of Bucky

Alaina's first taste of ice cream

The biking gang....

Ky and his buddy Jayquan

This phase is over...thank goodness! You should see the incredible things she does with her tongue!

Dog food found in the car's air filter....hmmm...I don't think Bear put it there...

Total coincidence to be on the same bus as Pops & Ryan

Alaina's first Brewer game

After a while...she got tired of sitting

Ky all dressed up for G'ma Bucky's funeral...complete with playdoh on his shoes.

Ky loving Aunt Linda!

Ky snuggling with Aunt Janice

Moments before the dessert swiping...

The guilty party afterwards...

A rare moment...which is happening more often...Alaina asleep in someone's arms!

The Playgroup gang ready to Bounce!

Pouting!

The cupcake recovery! Sugar makes everything better!

Cousin Rachel & Alaina

After the "incident"

Good lookin' kids!

One good lookin' family!

The Uncles...

Rare moment...take 2!

The happy couple! Paul & Lisa

Dancing with Daddy

Schnake family extended!

Bath Time!

This blog covers Memorial Day weekend to Ky's birthday. A LOT happened over this time frame--the biggest being the sudden loss of Grandma Bucky. Next blog published will be a memoir for her.

Saturday of Memorial day weekend Rob and I purchased a swing set for Ky's birthday. we were very excited. It was a basic 4 station swingset that we got for a good deal. We bought it with the condition that we would take it a part and transport it---NO PROBLEM. Gotta love the van! So we arranged with the lady that we would take the swingset apart after church (it was on that side of town.) and then we would bring it home on Monday since Nana was coming and Rob and I were going to have a date on that side of town anyway--our plans were perfect! (And I was ecstatic about this swingset. I wanted a basic swingset because I have plans to attach it to the playhouse above the shed. I'm going to build a platform between the swingset and playset that will be accessible via a rock wall and ladder. It will be really neat when I am done!

On Sunday, we left from church and headed to the lady's house with our tools when we received a phone call from Debi. She had been informed by a nurse at the home that Grandma Bucky would most likely pass in the next couple of hours. Debi was pretty upset. She was in Shawano several hours North of Milwaukee and worried that she would not make it on time. We also were over an hour away--but immediately hit the road for the home.

This took everyone by surprise. We had been told on Friday that Bucky was having a hard time, and was placed in hospice--but if you know Bucky, she always makes a comeback. We drove fast and were actually blessed by the fact that we had been planning to take apart the swing set--I had packed a lunch for Ky to eat, so he was able to eat in the car and then both kids slept since it was close to naptime. When we got there reality hit us. Grandma was struggling to breathe and not conscious. Turns out she has fallen out of her bed the night before and been in the hospital. They then transported her back to the home and she took a turn for the worse.

We held Grandma Bucky's hand and let her know that we were there. I think the hardest part for me was watching her children. I can't imagine losing my mom. I can only imagine the emotional turmoil they must have been going through. It was hard to watch her children deal with this loss as well as be put in this awkward situation. The siblings have not been getting along for several years now. In fact one of Grandma Bucky's greatest desires was for her children to be together again.

At one point, I told Grandma Bucky that all her kids were with her --and together, just for her--just as she wanted. She moved and made some noise. I know she was responding to me--and I know she was happy her kids were together again. I told her EXACTLY what she wanted to hear.

I doubt any of the siblings will read this blog--but if they do--your mother wants you guys to be a family again--NOW more than ever. What would Jesus Do? Put it all in the past and move on. Your mother would want this--and God would want this. I know that several of the siblings are willing to move on, we just need the last few of you to say "I love you brother/sister, let's leave what's in the past, and start again."

We stayed with Grandma Bucky for several hours and then took the kids to Nana's house. Once again, God created a perfect situation for us. Nana was supposed to come and babysit anyway at our house, so we were able to just drop the kids off at her house which was a mile from the home.

I need to step back for a minute and replay what was going on in my mind on the car drive to Milwaukee. I was in disbelief. I cried. I love Grandma Bucky. She has brought so much joy to my life. I could not imagine family dinners without her. She always kept things lively and exciting. She also valued me. She needed me. It's nice to be needed. Today, so many people do not want to ask others for help or do things--many believe it is a sign of weakness--but to those who are able to give it is a blessing. I love to help others. Grandma Bucky gave me that opportunity.....Okay this should go in her memoir...back to the events...

We returned to the home without the kids and stayed there for a little longer. There was one point where I think we all thought she was going to pass as her breathing faltered. I remember this moment so vividly as all the siblings and grandchildren began to cry out "mama, grandma, we are here, it's okay." Wow--what a moment. Something I will never forget. How loved she must have felt at that moment. I only hope that when I am on my death bed I am also surrounded by so many who love and support me.

It was getting late and Rob and I knew we needed to get back to the kids and back to Madison. We left saying our goodbye's to Grandma Bucky, knowing they were our last. I honestly don't remember what I said to her as I was too overcome with emotion, but I know that I told her that I loved her and that Jesus was waiting for her and would hold and love her like no other could.

Grandma Bucky passed on Memorial day around 7:45 Am. I find it fitting that such a wonderful woman could pass on a day that would always be remembered. She would have liked it that way :) More to come on the life of Grandma Bucky in the next blog...

Memorial Day morning we then ran out to the lady's house, dismantled the swing set and loaded it in the van. We had a tight time frame since we were going to bike around Lake Monona with some of our friends from our church's Life Group. Well--we couldn't do it. We were running late. We have wonderful friends though that chose to wait for us. Thanks guys!

So biking around Lake Monona was awesome. I think it is like 13 miles and was Alaina's first bike ride. We had a good time. Towards the end of the ride we stopped for some local ice cream (see first pics.) This was also Alaina's first taste of ice cream--and probably our big mistake as parents. The girl is hooked. She LOVES ice cream--and what a sweet tooth! She would cry until you gave her the next bite. Yeah, she is definitely my child---and I am my mother's child. Love for ice cream runs in the blood.

The kids had fun running through the field near the ice cream place. Ky and his little friend Jayquan are just too cute! They both like Thomas the Train so they had an instant friendship from the start. And Jayquan is SO polite. I have heard him correct Ky more than once on his manners.

Meanwhile Alaina was growling at everyone and sticking her tongue out--I loved that I caught her & dad sticking their tongues out at the same time. I am so glad she is done with that phase. It was really weird walking around with a growling child and her long tongue hanging out....Really weird...

After we returned from the bike ride, Rob decided to change his oil & air filters in his car. That is when he made a shocking discovery! Where the air filter was--there was cups and cups of dog food! We know a mouse put it there--we actually caught the mouse in the garage about a month prior--but boy was that little guy busy. Rob had to vaccuum out the dog food because it was in so many cracks and crevices of the air filter area. CRAZY!

I believe it was the day after Memorial Day that we had tix to a Brewer Game. We were excited--it was Alaina's first game and our first game of the year. We were running a little late so we decided we would go to one of the local bars and grab a shuttle bus to the game. Oddly enough who else was on that shuttle--Pops & Ry! Total coincidence! Now isn't it a small world! We had no idea that they were going to the game, let alone they were also taking the same shuttle to the game. How funny!

Okay I got to start putting things in a nutshell--this entry is taking FOREVER! so here is the gist of things (until I get to some good stories that is...)

The baseball game sucked---they lost by a lot, I don't want to see Suppan pitch again. Alaina enjoyed the game for about 5 innings, but then was done. Who could blame her, after watching Suppan blow the game. Daddy then had to stand and hold her in order to make it to the 8th inning, we then left--in rain (how fitting) for home.

G'ma Bucky's visitation was Friday night. We drove straight there. It was weird for the kids. I purposely didn't want Ky to see G'ma Bucky in the casket because I didn't want to have to try to explain things to him. He knew that G'ma Bucky was sick and he knew that she was in heaven with Jesus happy and healthy. That was all I wanted him to know. It worked out pretty well. I don't think he really noticed the casket. During the Eulogy, Ky was playing with stickers and put them ALL over Uncle Ry's back. It was really hard not to laugh. Kids are so darn distracting...

Pops gave a wonderful Eulogy. Lisa put together a fabulous slideshow, and the funeral home was decked out in G'ma Bucky's hats--she had hundreds of them!

We spent the night at Pops & Debi's and then went to the funeral. The kids were really great, though Ky was getting really impatient at the burial--and who can blame him. It must have been really hard for him to be around all these sad people and contain himself for 2 days. The dinner afterwards was also rough for him. IT was a very long time before the food was served and he was hungry, needed a nap, and needed to get energy out. Poor kid.

We also felt sorry for Uncle Ry who's jaw was wired shut after he broke it in football practice. There he was trying to shove little pieces of meat between his teeth. He was so sick of drinking protein shakes and soup--but I have to say it made the weekend a lot more humorous for us all.

That night we went home and the next day we went to Arlington Heights to visit Grandpa Herbst who is also in a home. He was sleeping and didn't want to get up. Aunt Linda was there and taught Ky how to say "Grandpa is sleeping like a log." The nurse eventually got Grandpa up--but I think he was just too tired to really talk to. We ended up leaving shortly after that. We will visit again soon and hopefully he will be more up to visitors then.

We then had dinner with Aunt Janice and Aunt Linda--and let me say, the food was WONDERFUL! Aunt Janice really knows how to put together a great meal. She made these pea pod boats that were stuffed with tuna--YUMMY! and I don't like tuna--that says a lot!

We had a great time visiting. Ky was playing games with Aunt Linda, and Alaina was rolling around on the floor. At one point, Ky wanted Aunt Janice to snuggle with him. Too cute! Oh I am so glad he had this special time with his aunts. I could just see Grandma Herbst smiling down on us, happy to see us all together.

For dessert we had this wonderful dish--and let's say Alaina's sweet tooth was out of control. She was sitting so nicely with Aunt Linda sucking on her nuk. She then waited for the perfect moment when everyone was distracted with conversation. She grabbed a giant handful of food, spit out her nuk, and shoved the food in. HILARIOUS! We were all laughing with tears in our eyes. Alaina loves to eat--and she LOVES sweets!

Later that week, Ky attended a b'day party at Bounce U. Basically it is a giant building with all sorts of inflatable things this kids can jump on/climb on/slide down. He had a blast...until he didn't wait his turn on the slide and slid into a little girl. He made her cry. And then he started to cry. After that he just couldn't get it together. For like the next 20 minutes he cried that he wanted to go home. The kids were having so much fun and there he was pouting...Get over it kid! But that is my sensitive boy. Very similar to me at that age. Sorry mom--I understand now!

On Friday of that week we attended cousin Paul's wedding in Milwaukee. It was great to see family again as well as Paul, who attended school in Milwaukee while we lived there. We drove straight to the wedding from Madison and attended the ceremony. That went pretty well, considering we had 2 little ones with us. It was after the ceremony when things got a bit icky. I took Alaina into the restroom with me and set her down. It was then that she exploded. All up the back of her dress and down her legs. This is why I HATE using disposables. Cloth keeps it all in. I honestly didn't know what to do with her. I took her to the changing table and tried taking her dress off. Yeah--not good. It was all up her back, in her belly button,...ugh. I tried cleaning her up with wipes, but since she already got it all over the changing table it was pointless. So I picked up my wee lass and put her in the sink where I gave her a bath. I probably looked pretty ridiculous to those coming in, but what else was I to do. I never had an incident this bad with Ky. Cousin Elizabeth stepped in--took one look--and stated "I don't miss those days." (Oddly enough she is due soon with her 3rd child and will soon be reliving "those days".) After putting a diaper back on Alaina and sending her out with Dad, I then had to clean up the bathroom and salvage her dress--which oddly enough had very little poop on it. So I gave the dress a quick scrubbing in the sink and we set it out to dry and put it back on her for the reception. WHEW! What a mess!

Between the Ceremony and Reception we had some time so we walked through a nearby park with U. Ry & U. Rick. It was nice, I also got some good pics of the family & kids all dressed up.

At the reception, Rob and I quickly realized that we should have ditched the kids at Nana (but we hadn't thought about it ahead of time.) Kids at wedding receptions are only fun for a short amount of time...Then they get tired and crabby or want to play with things they shouldn't. Not to mention we got seated at the table with all the Uncles & Cousins still in college (and Rachel still in HS--but she was way more mature than the boys.) But of course Ky was fascinated by the boys and got a bit too riled up. By the end of the night he was on a sugar high from Ice Cream Cake (YES THEY HAD ICE CREAM CAKE for their wedding-SWEET!) and had coffee spilled down the front of him--which we believe happened by one of the boys. We were all to glad to go back to G'ma Debi's and G'pa's to sleep.

The next day we had a small Schnake family reunion lunch and then we drove home to prepare for Ky's b'day....Yes the busyness never ends....You probably noticed I am behind on my blogs....This summer has just been so BUSY I am having difficulty keeping up---but don't worry I have been taking pics and I do plan to catch up..so stay tuned--next blog will be in memory of G'ma Bucky, then Ky's b'day, and then our vacation...but oh yes--I have about 2 more blogs after that coming.....I will catch up..I will! Happy Day!

Longing for Vacation

Alaina 7 months (best pose I could get!)

Ky at six months

Take that you Bear!




Ky opening an Easter gift from U. Adam & A. Liz

The train show

Jordan's confirmation

Ky & cousin Dominic

Gotta love the hat! 25 cents at a garage sale!

Alaina & G'ma Jan

Nana & Alaina

Ky planting corn

Part of my herb garden

The garden all planted!

Ky decided to put his clothes on over his pajamas. Silly boy!

I love this!

Yeah..I'm cool!

Loving the freedom of summer!

Taking can goods out in his pj's

Another good meaL!

Her hair has lightened since these photos...

Ky's completed geometric puzzle

Proud of his creation

The board prior to putting on the pieces

I am ashamed by how long it has taken me to blog. Summer has come and with that has come a busy schedule and an intense desire to get out of here and go on vacation! There is always so much you want to cram in with the warm weather. To enjoy nature, God’s creation at it’s fullest, is so important to the soul. Time to narrate these pics…

So the top pics are of Easter presents that we forgot to give Ky on Easter. They are from his U. Adam & A. Liz. He LOVES the Thomas color form set they got him. They make a great toy for the car as well. Thanks guys!

The end of April, Rob took Ky up to Green Bay for the weekend to a train show with Grandpa and his cousins, Devon & Jordan. That left me and Alaina for a girls weekend. Well, I know Ky had fun. He really enjoyed watching the trains. Rob said he grew impatient when Grandpa wanted to stop at booths to ask questions. All Ky wanted to do was watch the model trains go around and around. Rob was also good and took pics for me this year (last year he forgot).

Alaina and I enjoyed getting extra sleep and eating Chinese food and watching movies and sewing. She slept A LOT! So I was able to get a lot of sewing done. Lucky me! It was a very nice weekend, but I was also very happy to have my boys back.

A week later was Jordan’s confirmation. We drove to Milwaukee for that. It was interesting taking Kylan to a different church. I don’t think he was aware that there were other churches. It was a very new experience for him. And even now when we tell him we are going to church he will ask which one.

After Jordan’s confirmation we celebrated an early mother’s day with Nana (Rob’s mom). Ky was excited. We took Nana out for lunch at Beans N’ Barley and had a nice walk there and back. The kids really enjoyed being out. It was a very nice day.

That week we planted the garden. I had Ky help me this year with planting some of the seeds. Specifically, I had him plant the corn. I thought he would really enjoy watching how tall the corn stalks grew. It was a hard week trying to get the garden in as quick as possible (I usually like to have it planted a little earlier.) It all got done though—and looks good now (except for the many weeds—I am having a really rough time with the weeds this year.) The corn is already knee high (by June 9th!) We planted snow peas, sugar snap peas, beans, radishes, tomatoes, peppers, cucumbers, yellow squash, zucchini, and corn. I have had to since replant the zuchinni and yellow squash. I had very little come up. I think that the birds must have grabbed the seeds or something. Very odd!

Couple of other pics….We forgot to put can goods out to the curb for the local pantry, so we sent Ky outside in his pajamas to do it. It was too cute watching him parade outside like a “big kid” with the heavy bag of food. He was so proud of his “special” job.

At 7 months or so, I took this really cute picture of Kylan in his Pooh pj’s sitting next to his giant pooh. I wanted to get the same pic of Alaina at about that age. Well, it was pretty much impossible to get the same pose, since she kept attacking the bear. I tried—I guess that was the best I could do.

I am trying to think back so I can get the kids milestones—bad mommy! Must blog more often. Let’s see around 7 months Alaina got her 2 bottom teeth—they took forever to break through. As always, Alaina is very close to crawling, but she’s not. She gets up on all fours and continues to rock. She will even move her hands forward, but had not figured out how her feet work. Hopefully, soon. She says “hi, bye, mama, dada, amen, yeah.” She repeats many sounds and noises. She growls at her brother—especially when he growls at her. She cries when he yells at her. She can be very sensitive. She also cries when we dump water on Ky’s head---we don’t know why. She is sleeping through the night. We are all feeling very well rested. We also feed her pretty much anything. She LOVES food. Alaina loves to swing. When she is upset we put her in her swing and it cheers her right up. She sometimes grabs onto the side and stops herself which is funny. But she will let go and swing again.

Ky is just as smart as ever. We are up to letter “H” in the alphabet—as far as sounds, and writing. The other day I was giving him words like “Blasphemy” and asking him what letter they started with—and he did an excellent job figuring out which one. He is also into this geometrical puzzle game I got him. In this game he has to figure out how to use different shapes to make up a picture. Not just any shape will do. Well as you can see by the above picture, he is doing an excellent job. I did not help him at all. He did it by himself.

That’s all for now….Many more updates will appear within the next week, as I will be publishing 2 – 3 more entries…including—Ky’s B’day! Have a good one!

Making Work at Home Work by Mary M. Byers

I have recently been blessed by the opportunity to review books and I am excited! I love to read and since Alaina’s birth I have actually made it more of a priority. There is nothing more relaxing for me than to snuggle with a good book. Making Work at Home Work by Mary Byers is my first book review. I will be adding many more in the future, and will be making a special link so that you can view all my reviews at once. I know I have many friends that love to read and have requested me to share my books online—(Ahem…Julie & Becky). Here is my answer to your request, conveniently stored in my blog. Enjoy!

I first picked Making Work at Home Work to review because the title intrigued me. How can you be a stay at home mom and have your own business? How can you possibly balance family, household, and sanity and do it all from one place—your home? I have been a SAHM for almost 3 years now and I still struggle with just getting the housework done! I would love to leave my current part time job and do it all from home, but how? I was hoping this book would answer my questions to the possibility of making it all work as well as guide me to a new at home career.
Mary Byers not only answered all of my questions on balancing family, business, and household, but she outlined just about everything you need to do to run a successful business as well—she even included tax information and retirement plans! By the end of this read (actually after a few chapters of this read), I became jazzed about the possibility of working from home and being successful at it.

In the first half of the book, Byers helps you focus on setting realistic expectations for your business. She covers everything from putting together a business plan, balancing family time with work, keeping up with household chores, and scheduling your work hours. With all these factors, one thing really stood out to me. Byers understands that running your own business does come at a cost, but it should not interfere with your main priority--family. For example, she makes it clear that you should not panic about turning away business if you don’t have time. She also gives great suggestions in dealing with these customers politely and making attempts to work with them at a later time. I know that any small business owner would be scared to turn away or lose business when they are concerned about their survival (especially in this market), but the bigger picture is the survival of your family and making sure you have time for them. Her focus is RIGHT ON!

I think the trickiest part for any SAHM to start a business would be finding the work hours. Byers addresses this with multiple solutions. She mentions using nap time, exchanging babysitting time with a friend, hiring the teenager next door, and negotiating part-time daycare. One of her other ideas for keeping children out of the office is paying your kids to let you work. Personally, I do not like this idea. I could see the kids taking advantage of this and making sure they always get paid to leave you alone. On the flip side, she does talk about involving your children in the business and having them do things like stuff envelopes or sort papers. I appreciated this and liked the idea of having your children feel more a part of the income of the family. (I would also be more willing to pay them from time to time). Being a Domestic Diva (aka SAHM), I also enjoyed her advice on housework (having everyone pitch in, getting a schedule, or even paying for some help), as well as making dinners (food exchange, recommendations of good cook books, cooking for the future). She also included some great quick recipes in the back of her book (BONUS! I love free recipes!).

The latter half of the book focuses on making your business successful and pulling in the dough. Her overall theme is “you gotta spend money to make money.” I had not considered the need or possibility of subcontracting help or putting away money for those days your business isn’t making money. She also discusses expenses such as buying a faster computer or Xerox machine. While it may not be vital to your business, if it saves you time and sanity it can easily become an asset—not to mention a tax write-off! (And yes she does talk about tax time!)

Overall, I really enjoyed this book. Byers gave me a lot of great ideas on how to run my own business. She spent time on topics I had never considered. I was hoping this book was going to give me ideas on what kind of business I may be able to start. Looking at it now, I realize that that is a personal choice that I need to reflect on and think about. No one can guide me to that except myself and those who know me well. Once I have that figured out, I know I will be using this book as a vital tool to starting up my business and making it run smoothly. In conclusion, if you are looking to start your own business or already have one, I highly recommend this book. It will guide you in making wise choices to ensure your business runs smoothly.