Room For Three

Well they fit....

Three carseats in the back of the Camry.

Yes--if you haven't figured it out, I am expecting. The due date is May 8. Since I will be doing a c-section (I am not going to risk a V-Bac after my scary delivery with Alaina), I am hoping we might be able to have the baby April 24 to coincide with August 24 (our anniversary) and September 24 (Alaina's b'day). My second ideal date is April 27--this would go with the "7" trend. Ky's b'day is on the 7th, I'm on the 17th, the new one would be on the 27th. But who knows how much say I will have with the date.

So do you find it odd that I already tested the back of the Camry for fitting carseats? Well--I did. As with each pregnancy, I went through about a week of total panic once I knew--and one of those panic moments was "will we always be limited to the van? What if it breaks down? Do we need to trade the Camry in?" Before I jump too far ahead in this blog, I should probably start back at the beginning...

Prior to marriage, Rob and I had discussed kids. I had wanted 3, he had wanted 2. We figured sometime down the line we would figure it out. Well, after 2 kids, I was really unsure about having a third, but always kept it in the back of my mind. Two kids are a lot of work--but THREE??Can I handle three? Of course, I then gave it to God and prayed about it. I prayed that Rob and my hearts would want the same thing. Whether that be 2 or 3 kids, we would both be content with the same. So we always kept the option of 3 kids open. Rob occasionally would ask me, and I would tell him that I am still torn. Finally we had a discussion in August. I told him that I do want a third, but I was really scared and wasn't sure if wanted to commit. I also told him that I had an "idealized" timeline--which meant us getting pregnant this month or maybe not at all. Rob said "let's just see what happens". Well just like Ky and Alaina--God quickly blessed us.

Once again, I knew about a week before you can usually find out. There were the tell-tale signs. The week that would confirm sent me into a panic. I couldn't sleep. I was up hours every night--often on the computer googling stupid things like "Do 3 car seats fit in a sedan?" and "How does going from 2 -3 children affect your family?" --BTW--I highly recommend NOT googling that, because only bad and more worrisome stuff came up--such as, you can only book suites at hotels b/c they won't let you put 5 in a room (by the way this is UNTRUE of most hotels) and 3 car seats rarely fit in the back of a car. (which as you can see, I proved wrong! HA!) Also then tons of abortion topics came up--and that just is NOT an option.

After about 5 days of this worrisome panic filled with many tears, I had a breakthrough. It happened at Lifegroup (our church group made up of 3 families.) We were discussing how God has control of everything and how wonderfully he has planned and made all of our lives and that is why he has protected us. WOW! At that moment I realized how selfish I was. God chose me to be the mommy of this little baby. He so carefully prepared us for this child. He put his own touch in creating this little being. How selfish am I? And honestly a lot of it came down to convenience. Nothing is convenient in life. However, God has always prepared us for the difficult times and been with us throughout it all. He is faithful. He chose us as parents for this child because he knew we would succeed in raising him/her in his ways. WOW! Isn't God awesome!? And how flattered am I to have been chosen to take care of this little being, this piece of work--God's creation.

After that Lifegroup and since I have slept through the night. My heart has been at peace (of course I still wonder about things--but I know that God is by my side and everything will be just fine.)

So here I am now about 7 weeks pregnant and for the last week I have been STARVING! WOW! I just want to eat and eat and eat and eat and eat. I have held back. I am already starting to show. I need to fit in my pants a little while longer yet. We were hoping to keep it from Rob's side until T-giving, but I don't think that is going to happen. I have yet to take the pee test for the doc. I am just not interested in toting my urine into the clinic again. It was embarrassing enough last time. They won't really do anything anyway until I am 10 weeks or so. So I am just biding my time.

I know my friend Rachel is pregnant too. I really want to have a preggo buddy--but she isn't telling anyone (including me) so I don't want to push her. Rachel--if you are there--I totally watched you down that Big Mac at Mc'D's a couple of weeks ago and I knew. You were eating like I wish I was. Seriously though...Another month and we can get on with things and not feel so secretive.

I did weigh myself today. I have only gained 2 lbs, which could easily be explained away with vacations. However, I am gaining it all in one place. UGH! I look forward to the 2nd trimester when things get a little more enjoyable and I start to feel the baby move. It makes things more real.

So do I want a boy or girl. Either would be fine. I always envisioned myself with boys so I wouldn't be surprised if it is a boy--especially with my appetite. All I want is MEAT & Carbs!

If it is a boy, that would be nice because then even though Alaina is a middle child, she would be the only girl and hopefully override any "middle child" syndrome. If it is a girl, however, then Alaina will have a best friend and TONS of clothes to pass down and share with her little sister. We will find out the gender for my own sanity. I have to start getting rid of all the clothes in the basement. I have 4 years of boys and girls clothes right now (yes girls--I have been blessed with hand me downs!)

Well I think I will end this blog here. I am very excited for you little one! I can't wait until I feel you! Love you!